Dreams, Visions and Contemplations

Sharing what I have seen with both my inner eyes and my outer eyes.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Mainly Sun Dreams Series

The Sun Celebration Dream

November 28, 1999

Part 1:

I had witnessed a primitive dance, celebrating the birth of the sun. According to legend a young woman had seen the sun in a vision and had tried to tell the people about it but because the sun had never been seen they didn’t understand. (In the dream I suddenly take on the role of the woman and experience the following.)

As the days passed following her sun vision the young woman became more depressed as she longed to see the sun. One day, unable to take it any more, she stood facing the east. She held her hands up in desperation and resignation and began to wail. The wailing was uncanny, deep from the soul, it was chant-like so pure and it was even beautiful. “I am dying, I am dying, I am dying,” she chanted. (The words and melody sounded Asian but somehow like it was telepathically translated I was able to understand it.) She kept chanting and she was dying because the vision she’d had had been too much and she couldn’t live like she’d used to.

Then, still standing facing east, her body forming an H, she began to stomp the Earth, stomping in a circle. Suddenly the Earth began to tremble and quake, keeping rhythm with her steps and a glow began to appear in the eastern sky and the sun rose in the East.

A lot of people had gathered around her and their faces shone in the rising sun. They stood there silent and amazed, in absolute wonderment. Then a woman with two heads sharing one body began walking through the crowd. The circle of people let her through and she made her way to the center. In an angelic voice she began to sing. She sang a song of joy and praise and this broke the silence and the feasting began.

Part 2:

I was telling some children about the vision I had experienced and we were going to put up a play depicting the vision. I related the vision in complete detail and the room was silent just as the crowd had been silent. I stood in the center of the room and mimicked the chant, “I am dying, I am dying, I am dying.” I got into the H position and began stomping my feet in a circle. Again the children, and by now some curious adult bystanders, were silent and looked on in wonderment. Although we were in a gymnasium it was as though the first morning was dawning and the crowd were seeing the sun rise for the first time. When I had completed my performance and after a long silent pause someone from the back appeared and started making her way towards the center. She said she wanted to be in the play and be the two headed woman who began the feasting. The silence had been broken and we began assigning parts of the play to the children.



December 3, 1999

All night I saw halos of light and of fire. I was being taught about halos. I saw a baby with a halo of fire.


The Sun Stands Still

December 13, 1999

It was just about New Year’s and I ran back to my mother’s to ask her what we should do or say in the event that it would be… you know – final. (End of the world.) She still insisted not to worry but she ran over to the Church to buy a place in the book. She donated $10 to have my name placed in the book. My aunt came back and she was happy (relieved) that my name had been entered in the book. It was now 12:01 am and my mother exclaimed, “See!” I realized that my youngest son was alone so I bolted out of there to be with him because we didn’t know the exact time it might all end.

It is still just past 12:00 (but I am unsure if it is now pm.) My youngest son and I are sitting in the sun. He has fallen asleep on my lap when the sun suddenly stands still. A huge sweeping golden light jutting out from the sun sweeps the Earth. It hums and swings like a gigantic pendulum and as I watch it sweep over my foot I feel a strangeness in my foot. It is like radiation. Then the sky goes dark, not pitch black, just a greyish dusk, and it will stay like that forever.

Almost everyone and everything has disappeared even the walls of my house are gone. I pick up two tote bags with some of our belongings. There are towels and face cloths, some of my work and a new outfit for my youngest son who (I am made aware) will be a messenger of hope. Then my son and I begin to walk. We see that many large areas of the Earth had become barren, like the moon.

My son’s new outfit was a pair of beige US Army pants with classical insignia on them. I saw they had three red stripes and two sets of yellow arched stripes. At first I was afraid that his outfit would scare the few survivors but then I realized that instead it would offer them a sense of security. It seems we needed to get to Barcelona, where my son and I would be able to partially restore the sun. The moon appeared huge and very close to the Earth and was blocking the sunlight but the bit of sunlight that did get through was seriously high in radiation.

Later I was talking with a black man about the things I had seen, like I was telling him about the dream, and he asked me about the stripes on the suit. He was insistent on knowing if the stripes were indeed red.


The Sun Game

December 14, 1999

(This is not a dream; it is a conversation with my youngest son about is dream.)

My youngest son woke up in the middle of the night and asked me if I’d heard about a game called, “The Sun.” When I said I hadn’t he explained to me, “when the black dog is upside down and a zero (0) flashes below it, then you have beat the game (or the dog.)”



December 22, 1999

I was in Italy, visiting, and all over town the streets were empty. I could hear the announcer talking about “violenta,” and I wondered if it meant “violin,” or “violence.” I walked past this building with nice cars parked in front. There were lots of cars; I noticed when I got closer. They were all black cars, they were very shiny and expensive looking. I saw some men going into a building and there was a sign that read, “Violenta.” I got scared and thought “what if those guys are bad guys and me standing there staring at them would be asking for it (for trouble.)” So, I crossed the street. Eventually I walked into a building and there were funerals everywhere. On the main floor there were at least 12 rooms, each holding a funeral. I went upstairs and found a coffee room filled with Italians. Someone saw me and called out, “Allo.” I repeated, “allo,” and walked in. A man, sitting by himself on the couch, stood up and motioned for me to join him. I went and whispered, “Francesca ou Englaise,” he smiled and in French, he said, “je parle français.” I looked around the room and noticed the same, “violenta,” signs and people were talking about it. So I asked the man beside me what it meant, but a woman sitting on a chair beside me answered. She said that it had been over 3 months since the Champs des Lauriers had laid off all its workers. She explained that a certain group had threatened the “Champs,” if they didn’t sell. The owner tried to make a stand, a statement on behalf of his workers, but he was murdered. She said that big corporations were running all the businesses and that most of the town and country were unemployed. Then the war began and so far 30,000 people have died. The man beside me had joined in this conversation as well. The man then said a sentence with the word, “Guido,” in it and I told him that I didn’t know that much Italian but he just smiled and told me that I had understood.

The woman had been married 3 times. Her 2nd marriage had been to a very important man – one of the big guys who had overthrew Italy, and she had felt responsible. She had left him because she didn’t agree with what he was doing and she ended up marrying the man who owned the “Champs des Lauriers.” This was his funeral. The place was full of people, the workers who loved him.

Now she was a widow, she was working in a gift shop and the woman she worked for had broken her glass ring that her husband had given her. She had picked up all the pieces and glued them together and made (the shape of) a flower with it. It was like a mirror and she held a rose to it and the rose was reflected perfectly in all of the pieces.


Full Moon

December 22, 1999

I was still living in a little house I once rented across from my grandparents’ place. I had gone outside to search for the Solstice’s Full moon. The sky was cloudy but began to brighten; it became almost as bright as daylight. I couldn’t see the moon when suddenly my husband shouted, “There it is!” The moon was just above the horizon in the southeast direction and it was rising up from behind a cloud. I looked straight up and noticed that the clouds were travelling really fast. The sky grew brighter still and suddenly the entire full moon was visible. It appeared very big, as big as a building. It was moving quite fast and it looked more like earth, it was bluish and I could see clouds rushing around it. Suddenly I heard a loud cracking noise and I thought it was thunder, but I never found out what it was.


Train Survey

December 25, 1999

I was on a train with my husband and there as a team of people going from passenger to passenger asking questions, like a survey or contest. When they got closer to us I overheard them asking a woman a question, “Which government if any do you have most confidence in?” The woman replied, “That’s easy. I have absolute faith in so-and-so and so does my friend so-and-so.” (I don’t remember the names.) I told my husband that I’d like a question like that. Then a woman came to ask him questions and my husband was playing dumb. He was being sarcastic. Then a man came to ask me questions. He handed me the question on a small wooden block. It said, “I have a dream.” I was puzzled and the man said it went with something else. He opened a box and in a slot, number 28, there was a t-shirt that went with the question. I opened it up and on the front of the t-shirt it said, “I have a dream. I have a castle.” In the center was a large, bright yellow circle, it was a sun. On the bottom it read, “2nd award,” (or reward,) and the man said that I’d been granted another sign. He said it was very special and by then lots of people had gathered around me and they took my picture. Later I was telling my husband about the signs that I had received in previous dreams.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Dreams 15

Someone Keeps Stealing my Corpse

September 21, 1999

I was a man and I had died. I was laying in my coffin and I was able to hear and see everything. Someone kept stealing my corpse. I was also my female self and related to the dead man, his sister. As his sister I was always out fetching the stolen body of my brother and bringing him back. At one point, as I lay in the coffin, something opened up at my feet – like a screen. I realized I’d been granted a gift and a glimpse of the “other side.” I see a sky and it is brightly illumined and I’m told that I can keep my body and bring it with me on either side. If I stay I will remain aware of the “other side,” and I’ll be able to travel back and forth. Then there is a crazy woman who is trying to stab me but I am already dead.


Gave Birth to Twins

September 27, 1999

I had given birth to twins, a boy and a girl. I was so surprised that I had forgotten their time of birth and weight, but I remembered that the baby boy had been born first. Sometimes the babies were cats or turkeys and at one point someone asked how I could have given birth to turkeys and I was really hurt and said I didn’t know but that I loved them anyways. As I was doing groceries with the twins I had a hard time holding on to the girl, she was always so weak and listless but the boy was active and strong. The girl kept slipping out of my arms so I wrapped both the boy and girl in a blanket together to make it easier to carry them. I couldn’t decide on names for them so I went through some old religious books that had belonged to my mother as a child to try and find appropriate names for them.


Sign from Vishnu

October 18, 1999

I was doing the motions as a dream voice explained, “Cross the path of rocks; sit cross-legged on the bamboo steps going down the mountain; at each step I must make four movements using my arms and torso towards the sky.” When I reached the bottom a little white bird appeared with a strange black marking. The voice said that it was a sign from Vishnu.


End of the World at 1:00 am

October 26, 1999

It was going to be the end of the world at 1:00 am and that afternoon I was at work in a basement bookstore. My husband owned the bookstore and he’d just sold a very expensive book to a customer and when his wife asked to borrow a book my husband allowed her to borrow it. Then my ex-mother-in-law called and asked if she could borrow a book and my husband replied that he wasn’t a library. I was offended and so I paid for the book she wanted to borrow and I left to bring it to her. Later that night I was at home with my husband and two sons. I asked my husband what he was planning on doing before the world ended and he said he wasn’t going to do anything, he was just going to go to sleep. When 1:00 am approached everyone except my youngest son and I was sleeping. We looked out the kitchen window at the full moon that brightened the sky. All was till when suddenly a man with white hair was walking on our street. Then I realized he was an Apocalyptic Angel, here to choose and sort the people. I got scared and shut the curtain but my son and I had enjoyed the moon so much that we decided to sneak outside and watch the moon some more.


Three Old Ladies

November 5, 1999

I was walking along the main road in my hometown and I acme across three old ladies. I stopped to talk with them. Then they began to dance and I joined in and started tap-dancing. One of the old ladies said she had known my grandfather and then she said I’d gotten the gift of dancing from him.


Crossing the River with a Black Woman

November 5, 1999

I had to cross a bridge over a river. The river was on the main road of my hometown, where there is actually a creek. There was a black woman with me and I told her I was afraid of bridges. Then I realized it wasn’t so much the bridge but the rover below. I managed to cross the bridge but I did it on my hands and knees.


Disks Rotating Around the Horizon

November 11, 1999

On the horizon I saw huge disks, as big as the setting sun. The disks were revolving around the horizon from East to North and each disk rotated counter-clockwise. There were 9 disks because (in the dream,) I exclaimed, “My 9 spheres.” Each sphere was a different colour and had different characteristics. The blue one had a constellation of stars circling it, clock-wise from Earth to Sky. The red one had a ring that also circled it.

Later that day the sky looked funny/strange. It was like the sky was made of a thick substance, like a mattress. The sky was blue and everywhere there were whitish-grey spheres embedded in the thick substance. They did not move, (they looked like what BB pellets would look like if shot at a wall and had penetrated the first layer.) Surrounding each of the spheres were white clouds,

Later, at night, the sky was pitch black except for tiny sparkles from the stars, there was no moon present. I could hear a strange blip-like noise, an electronic sound, and this scared me. Up in the sky the stars formed constellations that I’ve never seen before.


Grandmother’s Eyes

November 12, 18 and 21, 1999

My grandmother was sick, on her deathbed, and we were watching over her at home in the living room. There were lots of people present because someone else had recently died, it was a neighbour. A lamp had been taken of its stand and I had to ask my grandmother how to put it back together. She had a very hard time opening her eyes but she managed to say my name.

I was visiting my grandparents’ house although it was demolished. It was like a mental voyage and my ex-mother-in-law was with me. She was scared because she knew the house was demolished and she couldn’t figure out why she could see it. She took a stick and poked through an open window at the curtains, trying to get a view into the living room. I told her to stop and that she didn’t have to be afraid that we (my mother and aunt) visited there often. I managed to convince her to come inside and have a look. She was afraid but followed me around.

We were at my grandparents’ house and nobody loved the boy (I don’t know who he was except that) he was my brother. My grandmother was sick and so we had moved her to my old apartment across the street. I went back to my old place to visit my grandmother. My aunt and her daughter had also moved in with my grandmother and I couldn’t figure out how they all fit in that small apartment. I went to my grandmother’s room and visited with her. When she realized it was me she was very happy to see me. I kissed her and looked into her eyes; they were all weird and rolled in her head, then they just looked cloudy and there was something about her pupils.


Digital Clocks 7:71 and 7:75

November 23, 1999

The time on two different digital clocks read 7:71 and 7:75 while the regular clock read 1:00. I lived in a nice brick bungalow and my husband was going to be back late so I was supposed to leave a door unlocked for him. I was standing outside when I noticed a red light in the sky and I realized it was a star (or planet) and right next to it was a gigantic white star about half the size of the moon. This scared me and so I went back in the house and locked the door and decided to wait up until my husband got home.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Mandalas 4

These were the final mandalas in this group:

Dreams 14

Talking Doll and Otto Preminger

August 20, 1999

I was at home in the basement, (a strange new place, not at all like my current home.) I was rearranging things and going through some games I had purchased at a flea market. My friend walked n and I asked if she would come by tonight to play some games but she made an excuse and left. When I went upstairs and all kinds of people (old friends, felt like a surprise party for me,) were preparing the dinner table. One of my friends (actually the youngest daughter of my mother’s ex-boyfriend) was there and I was surprised. I asked if she still lived in town and she did. We remarked how we only saw each other at doctors, dentists or optometrists’ offices – always in medical places. Then someone walked in with a baby girl and handed her to me. I rocked her in the rocking chair and talked to her and suddenly she began talking back. Her speech became progressively better. Finally she asked me some tough questions of which she knew the answers. That’s when I realized it was a trick (I think the baby was a doll set up with a microphone and the voice was a husky female voice.) Then someone announced a surprise visitor – Otto Preminger was coming to dinner.


Church Steeple Fire

August 21, 1999

The Church in my neighbourhood was on fire. The cars were moving aside to let the fire trucks go through traffic but the cars were so preoccupied that they were driving on the sidewalks and I had to walk in people’s yards. I looked at the Church and then I saw the steeple was full of flames and suddenly it came crashing down. I walked into my childhood home and simultaneously I walked into my grandparents’ home. I told my mother and grandmother what was going on.


Secret Castle

August 21, 1999

As I saw a secret castle a dream voice was telling me, “The secret castle has many rooms and levels. There is a big treasure in the 6th but watch out for the ‘bad guy’ in the 8th, and then escape using the 11th and the 5th. To get to the 11th you must run between the floors on the 9th and finally in the 11th you are trapped in a cage that transforms into an elevator and protects you from all outside forces and brings you to the entrance of the cave.


Macrocosmic to Microcosmic

August 26, 1999

A dream voice told me, “To solve a problem bring it to its ultimate. If your problem is microcosmic enlarge it until you see/find your solution. If your problem is macrocosmic reduce it until you find your solution. You can reduce the macrocosmic and enlarge the microcosmic because they are the same.”


German Soldier and Jung

September 2, 1999

I was dating a German soldier. I think I was a spy. He was expecting a call from a superior and as soon as the phone rang and he picked up he began speaking German. Then he looked towards me and smilingly said, “…Jung,” and “Lister…” and in reply to this (as though I’d understood part of what he said,) I said, “Because she likes to read.” I had translated his sentence although I didn’t know a word in German. He looked at me as though he hadn’t understood my words and waved for me to be quiet. Then I thought to myself I’d better be quiet because if suddenly I could understand German then I would able to spy much more efficiently.


Strange Men in Rafters and Freaky Cat

September 3, 1999

My oldest son, my cousin and I were sitting in the living room. Suddenly we caught sight of something on the ceiling. The attic door was open and there was a doll hanging there. My oldest son giggled so I knew he’d put it there as a prank. My cousin had screamed when she saw it. I had a freaky black cat that had a white twin. The two cats communicated telepathically. My black cat was meowing eerily and circling me and I began to wonder if he was going to attack me. I decided to pet him and then the white cat came and they were okay – like all along the black cat had wanted to be reunited with the white one. I decided to have a look at the attic once again and I noticed woollen things between the rafters, like scarves and blankets. Suddenly pairs of eyes opened between each rafter, the wool was actually the clothing of the strange men hiding between the rafters.


Rabelais Loves Me

September 7, 1999

I met a young man who had bought me a card with the name “Rabelais,” written on it. (There were other names that I don’t remember.) It was a singing card. Later I went to an office and met a young man whose name was “Rabelais,” and I realized I’d had a dream (within a dream.) Rabelais was a lawyer and he was in love with me. Every time he greeted me with warm hugs, kisses and he often gave me gifts. On this occasion he had bought me a statue of a bird and he said it reminded him of me. When my husband had found out he had become jealous.


Street Fight in Imagination and Flying Lamb

September 11, 1999

A group of us were outside downtown when suddenly a fight broke out. Everyone was fighting and I was fending off attackers. One guy (a client from work) came at me and I flipped him to the ground and then another guy came at me and I flipped him to but his face hit the sidewalk and I heard a loud crack and saw blood come from his mouth. Then the scene suddenly transforms and it is night but we are all still together downtown. We realize that the whole fight had not really occurred, it had been a figment of my client’s imagination and we had relived it. Suddenly I see a bird on the roof of a nearby building. It is large, white and squawking. I ask everyone what kind of bird it is, I was wondering if it might be an ostrich or a turkey. Suddenly it flies down and begins running about on four legs so I realize it is not a bird. I see it is a white lamb and I was instantly filled with a deep sense of peace and I knew I’d been granted a gift. Everyone was asking me what it meant but I was unable to explain, I was so peaceful and felt a strong sense of inner power.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

More Dreams (from Book Three)

Mandala of Landmark Experiences

July 12, 1999

I am shown a mandala. All around the circle are images of all my landmark experiences and memories. There is something in the center unfortunately I forgot what it was when I woke up.


Black, Pregnant and 17

July 12, 1999

I was a black girl, I was 17 years old and I didn’t know how to dance. Two friends showed me how and when I got the hang of it I began dancing around the hall holding an ice cream cone. I dances around and gave people a bite of my ice cream. It was a dance and there were people drinking but I wasn’t because I was pregnant.


Standing on the Universe

July 13, 1999

A dream voice said, “Standing on a chair that is on a table that is on the floor that is on a house that is on the Earth that is on the Universe…”

(Note: This dream was very crucial for me. It was this image that propelled me into deep states of meditation on many occasions.)


My Husband a Wizard

July 13, 1999

I woke up (within the dream) and found my husband in the bathroom. When I went to check on what he was doing he ran away from me. As he was running down the stairs I called him and when he turned around I noticed a big change in him. At first I only noticed he’d shaven off his moustache. But then as he approached I noticed he had long blond hair. I followed him back into the bathroom and I asked him where he had gotten the hair and I realized he had pasted my fresh cut hair on his head. Then he rearranged his hair and he looked like Einstein. He went back downstairs and I sat on the landing upstairs. Suddenly he appeared at the bottom of the stairs wearing a hooded cape. It was dark-coloured (Navy blue) with silver stars on it. Suddenly he leaped up a bunch of stairs, it didn’t seem natural, then he jumped again and he grabbed my legs. I asked him to stop because I was scared but he never even acknowledged me (like he couldn’t hear me.) He reminded me of some underworld creature. Suddenly another “him” appeared beside me upstairs. I had no escape and so I decided to resign to my fear.


Transgress Numbers

July 26, 1999

A dream voice said, “Transgress numbers! Numbers are alive and moving, not like animals, but like running water. You can arrest time, like freezing water; it is all in the numbers. Do not regress the numbers – but transgress them. (An additional note, as though the voice was reiterating the point,) “The water freezes because of the movement and it remains in this state because of the stillness.



July 27, 1999

A dream voice explained, “We are born out of Awareness. Out of Awareness we are given a tiny speck of awareness. Awareness is that which gives us existence. When our tiny speck connects with the Whole Awareness it feels like sexual pleasure and we are filled all knowledge (Gnosis.) Just as we do not require active thought for our hearts to beat we can live without active awareness. Our awareness is like a telephone that connects to the Whole Awareness but we are rarely plugged in, so even if the Whole Awareness would give you insight (and if you are not plugged) you cannot hear it or receive it.


Acknowledging the Opposites

August 4, 1999

A dream voice said, “In order to feel love you must know hate. You must acknowledge the opposites because denying them is rejecting their opposite! Let’s say that you deny hate, you do not acknowledge its existence within you then love will not come to you because it is channelled through the same source as hate.”


Daughter of a Witch

August 17, 1999

I was a young woman, maybe 17 or 18 years old. My mother was a witch, not a Walt Disney sort of witch; really she was just considered a heretic within the Catholic community. We lived in our own community where we were tolerated. My mother put on a long semi-hooded robe, it was pink, and she instructed me to do the same and meet her outside. She left with my younger sister and brother (about 4 and 2 years old) they had a different father than me. I had a hard time putting on my robe, it was heavy but of soft material. Once I had it on it dragged on the floor and it was very difficult to move in it. I was thinking that maybe one day the villagers would turn on us but then I realized that even the other witches considered us heretics to their beliefs. I walked along the courtyard shyly not looking at anyone and made it to my mother’s quarters. My siblings were preparing their tiny beds and my mother was in her bed with her second husband. There was no room left for me so I volunteered to sleep outside if she could only lend me some woollen socks. She didn’t have any but she gave me a piece of cloth to wrap my feet in. We lived in a walled village and so outdoors offered lots of shelter from the elements, yet we could still see the sky above.


Golden Flower

August 18, 1999

My mother, my youngest son, and I were visiting a woman I knew from work (a regular client.) My son was playing in another room with another little boy. It was near Christmas and there was wrapped gifts all over a table and we had to pick one. I picked one and inside the box was a set of earrings with a matching ring; they had matching blue gems except the gems on the earrings were lined in gold petals (to look like flowers.) My mother opened her gift and it was identical to mine. The woman opened hers and it was earrings and a necklace but her earrings were broken. I joked and said she could always use them to hang things on them and I hung her necklace on them to show her. Suddenly I saw a large golden flower in my gift box. (The flower was identical to the one I drew in this journal on July 18, 1999, except it was a real flower and more vivid.)


Thursday, August 10, 2006

Magical Truth Spheres


May 23, 1999

I was walking in a backyard with a tall man and at the end of the yard was a fence and without much effort the tall man lifted me over it. We laughed and I thought how it was nice to be lifted by a strong tall man. We were experiencing feelings for each other but he was married and worried – he’d even mistakenly called his wife “mother.” I thought “he’s afraid, like a little kid, he’s not that strong inside.”

My mother, my aunt and I were sitting together playing cards. Then the tall man and another man joined us. The other man passed me a piece of paper with a series of cards written on it – 7 ♥, 7 ♦, 7 ♠, 2 ♦ and “wildcard.” The tall man was dealing the cards and one by one I received the same cards in the same order that the other man had written. At first I thought he had been cheating but then as he kept repeating this I realized he just knew them.

The tall man then started talking nonsense about evil and devils and the other man and I thought about the spheres. They were a set of magical spheres made of ivory (or something similar) about the size of a baseball. Each sphere had a detachable greenish-black ring around the circumference. The ring had tiny holes all around it that held black and white (about pea-sized) beads. Simultaneously the other man and I had assembled a sphere under the table. When placed in front of us these spheres would hover and the effect would be that everyone spoke the truth – their inner thoughts. The tall man said something to the effect that we were going to go to hell and I told him that if he truly believed this that he would find himself be the only one in heaven.

New Weapon Induces Confessions


May 27, 1999

The military had invented a new weapon. While contained in the field of the weapon, the victim was made to feel as though he was the interrogator, and when the victim heard the confession he was suddenly aware of the confession having come form his own lips.

4 Weddings


June 22, 1999

I saw a triangle shape made up of circles, each circle alternating between green and blue. I also saw 4 different symbols and a dream voice told me that there were 4 weddings in life. The voice also said that there were different dimensions and the symbols were the key to unlocking and travelling between them.

3 Tunnels


June 26, 1999

There were 3 tunnels and I caught a glimpse of each of them through the entrance.

School: (I am a teenager in this tunnel.) The new school director wanted all the boys to wear ties. Some other girls and I decided to hold a demonstration against it. We showed up wearing ties and singing and dancing and the director was so amazed that he decided to let the students vote on the issue.
Money: An old childhood friend (who never had children although she tried) had a daughter. She was giving her daughter and some of her friends some money to go spend at the candy store.
Injury/War: Soldiers had been recruited among civilians and a group had been chosen from my hometown. I knew most of them. I had come across some documents, pictures of soldiers and information. There was very little information about this group because it was illegal. On one picture of a guy I knew there was the word “Injured,” stamped across it. I had a memory (within the dream) of having met him; he had been an uncle’s neighbour.


Covert Operation

(This dream is possibly continued from tunnel 3 above.) I was working against a secret or covert military operation. The top guy was a double agent. It was time to call back the soldiers and I told him to wait until we’d left (so as to not blow our cover) but he insisted in bringing them back in our presence. So I asked that in the least he didn’t let the American soldiers see us (this mission involved the participation of both American and Canadian soldiers.) We were finally granted the right to leave headquarters but the soldiers were already on their way so we had to be careful not to be seen on our way out.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Mandalas 3

These are the mandalas I was drawing during this period of dreaming.

Signs of Worldwide Catastrophes


May 18, 1999

I had dreamt about some signs that indicated an imminent worldwide catastrophe. I was relating my dream and the signs to my family and some friends. They were sceptical and said that I placed too much importance on my dreams but then the wind began blowing furiously and they got scared. I had prepared a shelter in my bedroom closet. We went there and began moving things around, like the dresser in front of the window so if the window broke it wouldn’t send glass flying all over. I had a large coffin-shaped box that my youngest son and I would hide in. It was designed to open into the closet to connect with the 10 foot wood-floor passageway where the others would hide.

Big Brother Landlord


May 16, 1999

I was visiting my mother-in-law, she had moved to a nearby town. She lived in an old building that was run by a very strict landlord. He had posted rules on every wall and he had cameras in every apartment. He even had microphones in the apartments and he would talk to the tenants. If he wanted to wake a tenant he would start with a positive image, like “wake up, come on you’ve got a great day ahead of you, plenty of nice things to do like read a book, pick some flowers…” My mother-in-law gave me a tour of the building; it was like a building within a larger cement block building. In her apartment you could see cement blocks outside her windows but there was another door in her apartment that led up some stairs to an attic. The attic belonged to her.

Grandma’s Silver Rose Ring


May 14, 1999

I had a large silver ring with roses worked into the silver on my left (wedding) finger (where I presently wear my grandmother’s ring.) This ring gave off energy and the roses would transform themselves and would show other dimensions. My oldest son wanted the ring and I was about to give it to him when I remembered it had been my grandmother’s and I hadn’t removed since she had died. Then I thought, “No, it wasn’t my grandmother’s ring,” and I looked down and it was my blue sapphire ring and then it transformed itself into the silver rose ring once again. My son’s were starting at a new school and I asked my oldest one if he still had his t-shirt that had basically the same powers as the ring. He said he’d lost it and that is why he wanted to borrow the ring.

Alchemy Chapter Diviner


May 14, 1999

I had a magnificent book about Alchemy and I was reading a section called, “…Diviner…” This was a section for the initiate.

Blue Flag with Circles


May 12, 1999

I was chosen to be the leader of a country. This country had a blue and yellow flag with small circles (or stars) on it. I helped a lot of people. I helped them by praying, and writing prayers. Lots of people wrote and visited me.

Déja Vu


Journal Entry: April 2, 2000

If dreams are messages from the soul then déja vu’s with their dreamlike quality must also come from the soul. I noticed after a few years of experiencing déja vu’s that they always seem to occur during a trivial activity. I sit quietly with a friend and suddenly I see the events to come unfold before me. She is about to toss her pop can to the garbage pail but I know she will miss, I don’t have time to warn her however, and just as the can hits the pail, we say in unison, “That was a déja vu.” The experience fresh in our minds we discuss it and notice, once again, how trivial – “warning, the can will hit the pail.” We wonder why déja vu’s don’t occur to warn you just seconds before the tree falls on your head.

As I was walking home from work tonight wearing my headphones, to shut out the noise, I experienced extraordinary moments. A series of moments linked together yet not by time or space, it was just a sequence of events. As Beethoven played on my walkman, the music rising into an allegro in time with a breeze lifting my hair, the chain of events unfolded. I saw the ultimate beauty and vastness of the sky, at once the wind was caressing my face and Beethoven’s allegro was rising in tempo and I felt myself lifted! It was as though in that moment a door had been opened and heaven had been revealed to me.

Still very much at peace from the experience I noticed that the road ahead seemed welcoming and the road I had just travelled was throwing me a farewell party and all of this was quite comforting. Suddenly I was transported to a time in my childhood when I just wanted to walk away, and then I found myself feeling like I was walking with all the suffering children who at any point in time (including the present) just wanted to walk away. There we were just walking, peacefully, not worried of what lay behind and not fearful of what was ahead – just enjoying the breeze, the clouds, Beethoven and being centered in heaven.

If walking down a mundane road could have such an impact upon me then the apparently trivial déja vu must be a potential glimpse of heaven. The fact that I merely saw “the can hit the pail,” then was a reflection of the state of my sight.

Further down the road this following thought occurred to me. Who, as a child travelling at night, has not asked his or her parents, “Why does the moon follow me?” The most common reply being, “It just looks that way because the moon is so far away.” As I was walking home I realized that the clouds seemed to move ahead of me. I allowed myself to believe that the clouds were actually clearing a path and that the moon was indeed following me. And it was so. Instead of just appearing that way because of their great distance they actually followed me because of my short distance. They are the backdrop, the screen, on which I play my life. They are directly connected to me.

Déjà vu 2


Journal Entry (excerpt): April 22, 2000

Walking home from work last night, once again my thoughts roamed to the suffering children. My own are no exception. The populace worry about ozone depletion, extinction of animals, saving the trees, but we can’t even save our own kind.

How many children are destroyed, physically through malnutrition and abuse, emotionally through neglect and ignorance, and spiritually by their wills being broken, by experiencing contradictions and stupidities? Most parents do their best. But how many people do you actually know who would reach out and help someone else’s child? What if that child’s parents’ were your enemies? Are we not all children from the same source? Can we not put all of our differences aside and reach out to help somebody based solely on their being human?

When giving donations there is a false sense of having helped someone, but before anyone gets help there is a bureaucratic process that includes processing and sorting, investigation and a series of tests to see who is most worthy of help. Who is the judge? I say if you truly want to give then do it personally. Do not assess the person’s needs, do not judge their worthiness to receive your gift, and do not give your own discards. Give what you yourself most need, give because you see pain in someone’s eyes, give because you sincerely want to make a difference. Perhaps then our children having been shown love, abundance and freedom, will grow up to save the ozone, the animals and the trees.

This process of thought was so powerful that I wound up in tears standing by the road. I continued walking and thought if only I could save one child and then another child and then someone else would do the same and this progressed until it culminated in all the world’s children being saved and then something shiny, glowing silver in the moonlight caught my eye. I stopped and looked down at the sidewalk and there where the moon shone embedded in the cement I saw a child’s footprint.

Monday, August 07, 2006

House Fire Dream Analysis

May 11, 1999

I had heard that our neighbour’s house was on fire. By the time I got outside to see it was already out but the entire house had burned down, leaving only a charred frame and it leaned onto our building. I went to visit the owner of the house, an old woman (I know in waking reality,) at the hospital. She was being treated for minor smoke inhalation. I asked her if I could drop by and visit her again. Then I am at her house, it isn’t burned down anymore. She was baking something and it smelled really nice. I visited the house and it was exactly as I remembered it.

I awoke (within the dream) and I was discussing the dream with my mom and some sort of analyst. We proceeded to analyze the dream. It seems that the house on fire wasn’t the main highlight of analysis; instead it was tray containing four coloured shapes. There was a triangle, a square, a circle and a cross. The cross was yellow.

Comet Announcement

May 8, 1999

I saw a comet and a dream voice announced to me that my “human development chapter was completed.”

Fiddling Contest with Grandpa’s Help

Older dream recalled on May 3, 1999

I had entered a fiddling contest. Not only did I have to play but I had to build my own fiddle. I had built it and was trying to play and tune it and I wasn’t getting anywhere. Just when I was going to give up my grandfather appeared and told me everything would be okay. I was going to argue with him but he said I already knew how to play all I had to do was remember; to remember how he used to play when I was young. Then all the tunes came flooding into my mind and not only was I hearing it in my mind – I was actually playing it on the fiddle. Everyone at the contest was extremely quiet; they were amazed. I won! When I awoke I was still playing the tune in my mind.

Circles within Circles

May 2, 1999

Throughout the night I felt like my dreams were circles. It was like the idea that “my life was a circle,” was the main reoccurring theme for the night. (Just like when you have a song in your head and you can’t stop singing it in your mind.) I thought I dreamt about a circle within a circle but I can’t recall any details. It’s as though the dreams I was having were taking place in between a small inner circle and the large outer circle.

Dented Camaro

May 2, 1999

My best friend and I had been offered a ride in the backseat of a red Camaro that belonged to a guy (I don’t know.) When I made my way towards the passenger door I noticed that the side was all dented and even the roof of the car was caved in. The Camaro was now gold or beige coloured. I didn’t think I could fit inside but the guy said we’d have to lay down. I decided not to take the ride.

Velcroed Together

May 2, 1999

I had undergone surgery on my right foot and my husband on his left foot, and we had been stitched together. Eventually we took the bandages off and separated our feet but every now and then we’d reconnect. It felt like Velcro.

Pyramid and Hebrew Figurine

May 1, 1999

I had just moved into a basement apartment (down a street in my neighbourhood.) It was a small apartment but it was cute and cozy. The previous owners had left some things behind in the cupboards and on the countertop. They had left typically stuff like soaps and bleach but then I saw a few things that caught my eye. I found a pyramid with a removable top and inside it was intricately designed with shell lining, mirrors and marble. I also found the figurine of an old man wearing a scarf with Hebrew letters inscribed on it. There was a girl in the apartment, watching TV, and she asked my why I was so excited about the old man figurine. I told her I had once had a dream that my name was really an old Hebrew name – the very one inscribed on this scarf. When she didn’t respond I continued telling her about more dreams and explained that I sometimes had out-of-body experiences. Then I told her about the Barcelona dream/experience. She wasn’t really paying attention so I stopped talking.

3 Parts to Death

May 3, 1999

I was allowed to see the death (s) that I would be experiencing. Death itself involved 3 parts. 1. The separation of two into one 2. A physical (death.) 3. Death is happy when someone gives in to the pain and asks the (*illegible…) man - you should answer.

Regain Consciousness Following an Operation

April 12, 1999

(I was scheduled for an operation to remove a ganglion cyst on my right foot. On the morning of the operation I woke up to the following dream.)

I could faintly hear the ringing of the telephone. Everything around me was black. Gradually the blackness lifted and the ringing phone became clearer. When I regained my senses I was sitting in the steps inside my house and I went to answer the phone. It was my mother asking me where I had been. I told her that I had no idea that I had just now woken up and had been sitting in the steps. She asked me how the operation had gone and how I had gotten back from the hospital. I told her once again that I had no idea, that I had just “regained consciousness.”

(When I woke up and was preparing to go to my appointment for the operation my husband asked me something quite unlike him, he asked, “What should I do if...?” I asked him what he meant by “if,” and he said hesitatingly, “If in case you don’t wake up?” I told him, after a pause, to do as we had always planned, “Just don’t unplug me,” I said. I finally made it to my appointment and the surgeon informed me that he wouldn’t perform surgery on me because he said I was a high risk patient under anaesthesia. This incidence and the above dream had me wondering about death and three weeks later, still wondering about all of this, I asked for a dream to guide me. The following dream was the answer.)

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Dreams 12

Caves of Sainte Anne

April 10, 1999

I was at my grandparents’ house along with my mother and I was telling them all about a trip I’d just returned from. I told them about having visited churches and caves of Sainte Anne. I explained how my youngest son had been afraid in the caves because of the echoes. Suddenly I was interrupted by a loud rumbling noise, like thunder. The radio was playing in the background and I heard the announcer state, “That’s right folks this wave causes houses to spontaneously catch fire, so get out and RUN.” We looked out the back door and I saw huge clouds of smoke. I would hear thunder-like explosions and then some small star-like puffs of smoke would fill the sky and fall to the earth. Then whatever the white stuff touched, houses, trees, etc… would instantly catch fire. I thought I saw our backyard neighbour’s house catch fire but then I realized it was a little further near the local high school. Suddenly the ground started trembling and I looked outside again and I saw that the people were running away from the heat and fire and looking for safety. I was about to join in the panic and suggest that we run too but then I thought how futile that would be and we decided to go hide underneath the house in the sand.



April 13, 1999

A dream voice stated powerfully, “The Centurion is over 100 years old and is made up of one piece.”


Serb TV

April 13, 1999

A dream voice said, “To destroy Serb TV is to destroy freedom of speech. Democracy is (especially State democracy) the fighter for human rights. Hey wait… you didn’t say ‘Simon says.’”


Cowardly Lion

April 13, 1999

I had attended my friends’ wedding and left just as the reception started so I could make it to the bookstore before it closed. At first I went the wrong way and I knew I wouldn’t make it to the store on time so I decided to browse around at the gift shop. I was there with my mother and my aunt. I saw some games, one was called QWERTY (only in waking reality did I make the connection to a keyboard.) One at the counter I saw a coffin-shaped toy and remembered it from a previous dream (within the dream.) I played with it hoping to decipher my previous dream. While fiddling around with a lever the coffin opened up and a skeleton popped up. I played some more with the lever and then the skeleton stood up but was hanging upside down. Then I realized that the skeleton came loose and it was really a lion that appeared to be tangled up in seaweed. Instantly my mother and I exclaimed, “The Cowardly Lion!” By then the woman at the counter who had overheard most of our conversation, she turned to me and asked, “Are you famous?” I replied in a friendly but sarcastic manner, “Oh yeah just like everyone else.” Then quite seriously she asked, “But couldn’t you become famous?” I thought about it and then I replied, “With these dreams I’ve been having I guess I could become famous.”


Hired by Embassy

April 15, 1999

Everyone in my family was trying to convince me to work with the refugees but I was trying to tell them that I wanted more – I wanted to work the front lines. At this they panicked and I explained I didn’t mean the “front lines” literally, just that I wanted to reach them somehow. Then I received a call from the embassy to do some work for them. If it meant going to Yugoslavia, well that was fine with me. (The rest of my dream is spent trying to find those who hired me; it was highly confidential.) There were military personnel following me from a distance and they were plotting my way, clearing a path for me. Along the way they fought their own army in order to protect my getting to the ultimate goal. I went through a marshy area where some soldiers were conducting practice exercises. As I approached them they became really defensive and wanted to know who I was and where I was going. Just then the military personnel were above in a helicopter and through loud speakers they instructed the soldiers. But the land soldiers were apprehensive and began arguing about rank. Then the man in the helicopter began calling each soldier by name and rank and they knew he was an “higher-up,” because their exercises in the marsh was highly top secret and they let me through. Then a friend showed up and he cut some bamboo and weeds that were growing in the marsh to clear the path for me.


Inner Outer Circles

April 17, 1999

Some countries were trying to speak up but they were being controlled by the United States. This was showed to me as an image of a small inner circle representing the "other countries" and a larger outer cirlce around the smaller one representing the "United States." Whenever the small inner circle tried to speak or come out of the larger outer circle it would be sucked back in like gravity.


Signs - End of the World

April 18, 1999

I had predicted some signs that the end of time was near and the signs had begun to appear. One of the signs was huge frogs. I was with my family at a motel and I saw a huge frog hop out of a closet in the motel room. Because it was so huge each time it jumped it would fall on its back exhausted. We were scared and tried to find a way to put it outside, finally we managed to put it out through the window and it hopped outside. When the frog would fall on its back it looked like a rabbit but on closer inspection it looked eerily human.

Later we were outside and in the sky I saw two yellow moons and they were moving. I knew it was the eyes of God and he held a candle in his hands. My mother, mother-in-law, my best friend and I sat on a swing in the backyard and held hands. We knew the time was up and we knew that somehow we would be okay.

Prior to this I had been at work and having difficulties with the computer and other equipment. A colleague then walked in, she had arrived from holidays and said that she had seen O.J. Simpson and Bill Cosby. One of them was sad about someone named Patrick (? The name is barely legible in my journal because I wrote it in the middle of the night and still very much half-asleep.) Then someone approached me to ask for a donation to help his niece or grandchild. He showed me her picture and it was obvious she was mongoloid. I thought the man was drunk and fishing for drinking money but then another colleague saw the picture and said there was definitely something strange about the child. I looked at the picture once again and I saw that she had three arms. This child was badly deformed.


Here is a poem I wrote as a result of the above dream:


The signs were clear,
The end was near.
The massive
contemptuous frog,
Had found its lair.

Abashed moons peering,
Lighted candles searing.
Looked down upon us in our darkness
Disdained to find us hiding.

The women united
Cuddled and
The boys we’d raised were chained
Upon thoughts-discarded

Tuesday, May 18, 1999

Dreams 11

Hostage Situation and I Meet the Queen

January 22, 1999

There was a convention at the local high school that had been converted to a convention center. In the center of the building was a large common area with a glass roof. The furniture was triangular as with the theme of the room. The colour arrangement was pastel. On all sides of the common room were passages leading to other rooms. I met my husband and my youngest son in the auditorium. A Columbian dignitary was going make a speech. The auditorium was full of people and I told my husband that I felt there might be an attempt to assassinate the Columbian dignitary. My husband said he felt the same way. As soon as the dignitary came on stage there were shots fired. I threw myself and my son to the floor for cover. Then someone threw a knife and it was coming right at me but it lost its momentum and nicked me in the knee. Eventually we crawled away to hide in a kitchen. My son and I squeezed between a wall and the cupboards and my husband covered us with a baby crib mattress and then he left to investigate. After a long wait my husband came back and all the shooting was over, they had caught the group of assassins. Later there was a parade outside and my family (now including my mother and aunt) were standing together watching. We were talking about the events of the day and how lucky we’d been when the Queen came out of the building. She waved to the crowd and she waved to us and then she began to sing in French. We were amazed that she could sing so well in French and also amazed to find that she sang like my grandmother. Then I started thinking how much she also looked like my grandmother.


Hebrew Books about a Black Man

January 25, 1999

I had moved to a local street near my childhood home. I was living really near a family friend (who in waking reality died two nights ago.) A girl I knew lived across the street and we were outside talking, she had company from a neighbouring town. Her guest asked me if my mother was the psychic. When I told her she was she became really excited and went to get some spiritual books. In her books I found a story about a black man who had been well-loved in his community, he was like a Mother Teresa. Theses Hebrew letters were etched next to his name and picture, to describe him: אוא and/or אלא.


Torpid, Loci and the Holy Mary

January 31, 1999

I saw these words, Torpid, Loci and another word and a voice asked me what I was doing to unite Torpid and the other word. Then I was flashed by a light, twice, and I was told that it was Mary, the Holy Spirit, trying to penetrate me (Mind? Body?)


Wildflowers, Butterflies and the River

March 14, 1999

I was running away from a man because I had hurt his feelings but I wasn’t sure how I’d hurt him. As I was running I crossed several different sceneries or landscapes. I went through tall grass, then paved roads, then through some backyards with neatly trimmed lawns, and the further I went I realized I was getting lost. As I was running and I looked back I saw a bed of wildflowers and I remembered having seen them before in a dream or daydream (within the dream.) I immediately stopped, because I remembered that just a few feet ahead, behind some tall grass, was the river. I knew that had I continued running blindly I would have fallen in the river. What had triggered the memory was seeing the wildflowers, it turns out the flowers were really butterflies and they all took flight at once. (I actually experienced this in waking reality about a year ago. While camping I came across a large circular area that appeared to be full of flowers. When I approached I saw they were butterflies and they all flew away together.) I sat by the river and noticed the water was calm and appeared greyish blue. While sitting there I remembered what I had done to hurt the man’s feelings.


4-Key Computer Reads minds

March 19, 1999

I held a new computer that looked more like a toy. (It looked like an upturned toy truck.) It had a keyboard with just 4 keys on it. I didn’t see any paper, ink or source of power attached to it. The 4 keys each had a symbol on them: 1. looked like a circular pile of hay. 2. Looked like a square made of something that looked like pretzels. 3. Looked like a twined rope. I can’t remember the fourth. I had been pressing the keys when a technician showed up and connected a roll of paper to the computer and suddenly all my thoughts that I had been thinking while playing with the keys were being printed.


Grandma Looking for Grandpa

March 22, 1999

I was volunteering at a hospital. I went around propping pillows for patients and reading to them. I went to visit one of my regulars and I noticed she was eating an entire plate of chocolates. She was diabetic so I immediately went to get a nurse. They had to give her an intravenous (in her ankle) so she wouldn’t fall in a coma. Then she fell asleep and when I saw she would be okay I went on. I was walking down a corridor that was full of hospital beds. It was very narrow and I wondered how a bigger nurse would have difficulties going by. Suddenly I thought I saw my grandmother in a hospital bed. When I turned back to see, there was no one there but the blankets were slightly raised. I was about to leave, thinking it had been my imagination, when I saw some movement behind me. I turned around and there was my grandmother. She said she was looking for my grandfather. She explained that she was about to come back to life, I asked her where she would like to come back, and she answered New Brunswick, by the shore. She was hoping to see my grandfather before she left. I told her that he was either making preparations to return himself, or he was doing special work or he might even already be back. Then I explained to her that time didn’t actually exist and so simultaneously grandpa could be with her right now but somewhere else.


Sky Opens Up

March 24, 1999

The sky opened up once again. The clouds had been moving fast and were going from blue to grey. This caused a rumbling noise. Then one large grey cloud formed a large circle and this made much thunder and the center opened up and a voice spoke to me. (I can’t remember what I saw or what was said.)


Tar and Fire Dome

March 29, 1999

The war was really on. A big bomb that looked like a huge flying dome of tar and fire had erupted and we could see it in the sky. Everything went silent. Then a panic grew and people everywhere were running to cargo trains in the hopes of fleeing. My dog Misty ran outside and suddenly she began trembling and gasping. I thought she was dying so I took her back inside and she recovered. It was like the air had been sucked out of her lungs. I found a place to hide with my family in a basement.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Dreams 10

Hebrew Letters are Key

September 3, 1998

I was shown the following Hebrew letters, יהוה and was told it was the key. Then I was shown these letters, יוהו and also told it was the key.


Parallel World - Must not Speak

September 17, 1998

I was at my grandparents’ house and I knew I was in a parallel world. My mother was sleeping on the couch and I bent down beside her to whisper something in her ear. I began whispering and woke up and I realized that I’d almost committed a grave mistake. When travelling to a parallel world one must not speak one word because of the power of the spoken word. (I was actually whispering when I woke up.)


Parallel World Construction

September 17, 1998

I was telling my best friend about parallel worlds and how in one such world my grandparents’ house had been renovated instead of being demolished and in another parallel world the house was being reconstructed. I brought her to visit the world of reconstruction. There were three men there, two that I knew from work and the third being the cement guy. M. complained about the cement guy and L. explained everyone was on a volunteer basis. The cement guy threatened to quit and L. left me to mediate. I decided that everyone should stick to the work they could do best and not worry about what the other was up to. So the cement guy should worry about the cement and the contractors should worry about building, etc… This satisfied them all and M. even apologized.


Ayin Questionnaire

October 17, 1998

There was a questionnaire and the question was about the true meaning of Ayin. It was a multiple choice question and the only answer I remembered was, “Esod (or Esau) of the great…”


Messianic Heart of Saint Denis

October 21, 1998

As a child I had been granted membership in the Messianic Heart of Saint Denis. (The stipulation was that one had to renew as an adult, to make the conscious choice to be a member.) I was now an adult with a mission and with the help of my mother I found the box that contained the membership information. We opened the box and within this box there was another box and in this box was a palm-sized heart, made from an unknown substance; it looked like red glycerine soap but it was harder. It was dark but suddenly it began to glow and became translucent. The paper that accompanied the heart stated that when a favour was granted or a situation was true, then the heart would glow.


Ayin at the Door

October 21, 1998

I heard a knock on my mother’s door. I was told it was Ayin.


Golden One

November 26, 1998

There was a woman called “The Golden One,” and she showed me many things. She taught me how to paint and mix colours. Then she showed me how to express myself, how to acquire inspiration, by locking myself into a black cast-iron cage about 4’ cubed. That is how she had died. She had locked herself in the cage, as usual, and had begun chanting. Others, of course, thought she was delirious. (She didn’t die because she was in the cage she just happened to die while in the cage.) After she died people cried because “The Golden One,” had died. Earlier (in the dream) I had been at my art class and I had forgotten my paints. I was working on something blue and “The Golden One,” had brought me a paintbrush with a dab of blue, and she tested it to see if it matched. It didn’t so she brought me to a room in the back to learn how to properly mix the paints. She used pencil shavings and mixed them into the paint with a little bit of black to get the proper darkness of the blue.

Dreams 9

The Boy with the Power to Hex

August 20, 1998

My youngest son, my daughter (no daughter in waking reality) and I had come to Earth on a mission to find the boy with the power to hex. He was a fallen angel and when he had first come to Earth he was supposed to use his powers in a positive manner to help spread love in the world. Something had happened when he came to Earth; something had attacked him and had made him forget his mission. While preparing for the mission, I was teaching my children about the dangers of attachment to Earth and how Earth’s beauty created an attachment. (It was like the more one associated with the physical aspects of Earth the more separated they became from the spirit and from their mission.) I found a picture of my oldest son when he was a toddler; he was wearing goofy-looking sunglasses.

The day came for us to do a test run to Earth and just as we were embarking my daughter changed her mind and stayed behind. When we first landed on Earth we were on a busy street corner. There was a street vendor with a cart and a monkey. The sights and smells were overwhelming and I turned to my son and again warned him of not getting caught up with the senses. We met up with a man who was like a liaison on Earth and he took us to his apartment where he desensitized us. He gave us different things to taste and smell and gave us instructions on what to avoid.

We finally did find the boy with the power to hex but he was surrounded by a negative influence. I asked him what was wrong and he said he had grown indifferent and that his powers were less powerful on Earth. He was young, maybe 16 or 17 years old. He was small for his age; he had straight, fine, brown hair, light brown (tan) skin and brown eyes. He was thin but all in all he looked like an average human being.


(Note: A few weeks following this dream and because it was so vivid and urgent to me I put it in a longer form as follows.)

How I long to return home. This place which captivated me with its charm and beauty has become my daemon guardian. I left home with my son and daughter; this was going to be an expedition to find the boy with the power to hex. Being more mature and learned in the matters of travel, I undertook to guide my children in the proper methods and instructed them regarding protection and security. My daughter was very attentive and apprehensive about the upcoming journey; my son was all wonder and curiosity.

In order to undergo such an expedition the following steps are necessary:

1. There must be a calling. You must be called to the journey at which time a mission will be revealed to you.
2. You must become familiar with your mission and undergo an in depth study of the necessary arts to fulfill your mission. These arts will vary according to the mission but one that is prerequisite is the preparation of journey.
3. The journey itself.
4. The accomplishment of the mission.
5. The return.

My mission was to find the boy with the power to hex and discover why he wasn’t making use of his power. The children were to come along as a learning experience. We had individually and jointly attended to all our studies and preparations for the journey. We had envisioned our destination. (Envision is visualization where one actually projects a portion of the self to the visualized destination.) We had experienced the city in our pneuma – or spirit form. In pneuma the destination cannot impose its material form on us. While in pneuma everything appears greyish but the majesty can still be intuited although not felt. My daughter had a strong frightened response to this trial run and I took the opportunity to remind her of the dangers of succumbing to the impulse. If in pneuma form one succumbs to the impulse then one will remain, regardless of one’s will, attached to the destination with no way of returning home. Therefore it is crucial to remember one’s status as a visitor.

The day of the actual journey had arrived. We would be fitted with a shell in order that we could express and be impressed with the material. In this form we could reveal ourselves to sensitives and impress upon them a message. The nearer we approached our destiny the more colourful and bright the Earth became. My daughter was so frightened that she let go of my hand and returned home. It was too late to turn back now and so I had to let her go.

My son and I arrived in the city by daylight. We were bombarded by all the sights, lights, colours, sounds and movement. My son still held my hand and I could sense his awe. I reminded him of the dangers of succumbing to the impulse as we made our way down an alleyway. I needed to reflect and collect my thoughts in the midst of this blizzard of sensations. The way everything was ordered in this locale added to the attraction. Everything we were experiencing was so vivid and defined. The characteristics of matter: light, colour, odour, sound, taste and movement, were the animating force, they came from our home but had become attracted to matter and therefore vibrated within – continual attraction in action. Once the characteristic had succumbed to the attraction there was no turning back and to liberate just one characteristic from matter would create chaos, an immense void. The natural law in the world of matter was much stricter than at home.
The skyscrapers reflected silver light that blinded our attempt at looking up and that is the moment the world became alive. Vendors lined the narrow streets, displaying all their wares, tempting passers-by with aromas of cinnamon from fresh baked rolls, eye catching lengths of crimson cloth, and trinkets that made music and melodies. Of our entire senses odour is our strongest tempter. At home we only experience smell in its raw form, that is, a faint rose-like aroma. All odours come from this one smell in varying degrees and configurations.

We had been noticed by quite a few citizens but the busy street didn’t reveal our secret, had we landed in someone’s study however would have meant certain discovery. Not that I minded being found out, we weren’t hiding anything but a confrontation would have delayed our mission. In hindsight I realize the danger of being so conspicuous about our plans. To let all the sensitives view us was inviting danger. I was naïve about the concentration of power on Earth and I didn’t think anything could go wrong. Since then I have become quite acquainted with Mr. Murphy.

We finally reached a safe house a place to rest and deliberate while on a mission. The safe house also acted as onsite training in adaptation to this world. The man who ran the safe house was a sensitive who enjoyed our company. He gradually desensitized us by introducing us to the different flavours and odours of his country. He knew that strong odours, such as onion or garlic, were too dramatic for recent arrivals, so he pampered us with sweet and soft aromas of basil, sweet paprika and vanilla. Our host was fond of nutmeg and he could never understand our aversion to it.

(I understand that it ends so abruptly but that is as far as I got when I recorded this.)